Wednesday, March 3, 2010

To a Parsnip

Inspired by Catullus and offered without one scintilla of commentary*.

To a Parsnip
After Catullus

For Eshu

Goodbye to Heaven’s alabaster root,
Sweet and dirty, hard and cold, a friend
Whose name escapes me now, tall and cute,
Uncircumcised, six inches end to end.

It pains me now to weigh him in one hand,
A knife the other, skinning him for stew:
But there’s more meat on Mr. Parsnip than

My friend possessed. It feels more human, too.

*This be an emended version, dedicated our faithful commentator Eshu, who hath found our original version funny, but our conclusion lacking Catullian bite. We hope he findeth our present alterations more to his Classical fancy. We wish for nothing more from Heaven than happy readers. God be wi’ you all. (Especially the Parsnip.)


Eshuneutics said...

This made me laugh, in a good way. It cheered me. I just wished the final line ended with a bit more with Catullus.

Shropshirelad said...

Hmm. I will see if I can put more teeth in it...

Eshuneutics said...

An end with a crunch!